Early in the morning

[cowgoesmoo]

[ Just before dawn, anyone monitoring the low-band station that Rem's transmitter is usually set to might hear the following short message from a child who is clearly trying not to panic. ]

Blades, this is Feathers-home, Feathers-home calling Blades, what's your twenty? Where are you!?

[ There's a pause of about a minute, then the message repeats three more times, and finally the transmission ends with: ]

If anyone out there knows who this is and you see my brother, tell me right away!

Comments

[ornamentals]

[ vash didn't remember rem, and hearing everything else the pieces start to slot into place slowly. nai knows with some sick feeling that vash was suffering, in some way still invisible to him. hidden beneath the surface there is something wrong, but what can nai do but ease that pain for his brother?

an independent will make up for what an independent has done. ]

Don't hurt him. Please.

[ there is so much more he wants to say, but a public broadcast isn't the place for it. ] ... and I will. Don't worry, I'm okay. Everything will be fine.

[dontdeserve]

Hey. Of course I don't want to hurt him. Even without you asking... there are the little ones, and then there is the one inside. The more the prison is hurt, the more he'll want to hurt back, and the worse it will get for the one who is helplessly trapped.

I don't want him hurting. But I don't want you hurting, either. I want you safe, and not having to make hard choices, and for you to know that you are loved. By all of us.

Even if you think that's stupid, or hard to believe, with all everything... it's the truth.

I'll try to keep the small one here as calm as I can, but I'm not exactly the person he listens to the most.

[ There is a hint of amusement at that. ]

[ornamentals]

Some things can't be helped... and if I'm the only one that can help him, then I don't have a choice.

If you needed me, too, it'd be the same. I have to do everything I can.

[ he's the only nai here, as far as he knows. one knives, or two, if the one he met in the bar decides to show up again... it feels like a herculean task to try and be the brother vash needed here, but nai won't quit just because it feels impossible. ]

He isn't hurting me... if you're worried about that. [ a pause, quieter. ] ... I know he's in pain. I know... something isn't right, but... I want to be here with him. Until- Until I can think of something else. Something that will make everyone happier.

[dontdeserve]

[ Vash doesn't know if anyone else can help ... that prison for Vash. But the fact that he put Nai to thinking that is the case makes him angry. ]

I don't to put more weight more on you. But I do need you, too, if not nearly as much as the one your age does. But we also want to be there for you, too. You are not the only one who knows the need to do everything he can.

It's why I - tried to keep him away from you. Because he wishes to be alone with you, and you deserve to have all of us. Your brothers. The oldest one. Your sister. Even him - I wished you to have more time before you met him. Not for you to never know.

And I have some ideas. I would talk with you about them, when we next meet. And then if you think they're all crap, and there is no other way you can see, I will bring you back to him myself. But please... please believe me when I say that I honestly think you staying there may seem like it helps, but it will make things worse. Even for him.

how did i lose this...

[ornamentals]

Don't forget I'm still your older brother too, Vash. Even if I am... smaller, right now.

[ugh!]

And it isn't like I don't want to leave, I just- can't. It's hard to see out of the windows, too.

[he adds, quickly -] But I don't want you or anyone else to try and force their way in here, okay? If any of you hurt yourselves or each other I'll be very mad.

oh noooes

[dontdeserve]

Brother...

[ (No names on the radio, he knows. He has already broken that, but that doesn't mean he do it again. If he can help it.) Excuse him as his voice wavers for a moment, even through the faint distortion of the radio. A part of him wants, so much, to be Nai's little brother again. To be a part of a whole.

But Nai is not just little. He is also young, and vulnerable, and with so, so much he has to deal with. And he needs him, just like Vash needs Nai.

His smile returns in his voice, though it is not harsh or hateful, not even a little. ]

I don't want anyone hurt, not you, not him, either. Or the little ones. And I'm sure watching us fight would be pretty horrible for you. So... I'll ask who I think is responsible for the whole bringing ups this way and that to bring you back home, that is all.

[ornamentals]

[why is every iteration of his brother stupidly stubborn? just for once, or even a few times, he wishes vash would actually listen, instead of trying to help in whatever way they think works best.

even when nai disagrees, it doesn't help. at least, not in this situation.

vash and all of his thorns was his responsibility to amend, another responsibility he needed to carry himself. so what if he was younger?]

You're right, I'd hate it if you two fought - or if anyone fought each other. Besides, I really doubt he's going to listen to you.

[a sigh! a very weary, older brother kind of sigh.]

I'm going to be fine.